Bible Beaters

Canadian Mayhem

Ep187 It’s the hottest Canada on record and people are burning down churches. Kyle is in love. In bible times there is a horrible forestry accident. An axe head flies of off the handle and sinks the bottom of the river and to top it all off, the axe was borrowed! Elisha gets trapped in…

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Follow Me or Else

Ep186 It’s the beginning of the the hottest week in Canada’s history. Kyle’s new neighbors have called the cops on his parties. After in enjoying the presence of the Shummanite woman Elisha meanders over to Gilgal and on the way him and his buddies make a stew. Somebody throws some poison in the pot by…

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Chariots of Fire

Ep182 (2 Kings 2) We get right into it on this podcast. We have to hold reserve host Simeon up before the lord in healing prayer as he has sustained a horrific scootering accident. Kyle is sliding into married women’s DM’s. In bible times the hairy man from the dessert has picked up an adoring…

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Heaven Gender

Ep179 (2 Kings 1) Kyle has annoying neighbors. Caleb has a JW neighbor. We get talking about genders in heaven and their complicated relationship. This leads into discussions about consciousness and cancer. The king of Israel had a few too many and falls off his balcony. Whilst he recovers he sends messengers to Baal Zebub…

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Well Fuck

Ep178 (1 Kings 22) It finally happened. We lost half a recorded episode and this is our best attempt at recreation. Caleb has a righteous stalker heaven bent on silencing him on facebook. We talk about the ideal way to get martyred and how shitty it would be to be a corporate prophet. Asa (the…

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Don’t Kink Shame God (1 Kings 21)

Ep176 (1 Kings 21) Blessings to the patrons! Kyle shares his feelings for once. Ahab, the worst king in 7 generations, whom god helped win a war against 32 kings, wants to buy Naboths vineyard. Naboth will not sell his vineyard. Ahab throws a temper tantrum and stop eating until his bea Jezebel takes matters…

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